Yesterday I was discharged from being an inpatient in hospital.  They told me this at 9am but it was 4.30pm before all treatments etc were over and I was set free.   Now while I thought that this was a huge step forward (and it is) and celebrated by having my first decent meal in weeks (thank you Aunty Mary) there are a couple of draw backs.  First my liver is totally shot or as the doctors like to call it “deranged” so I have become a wonderful shade of yellow.  However, you can only see the yellow in the places that the drugs rash is not covering and that makes for an interesting state of affairs.  In order to combat all this, and so that I can start the next part of my treatment, they have taken me off as many of the drugs as they can and this includes my bipolar medication which could be fun.  To top this off I have to go in to the hospital 3 times a week for various different tests and procedures.  Now for many people getting across town may not seem a great hassle, for me it seems impossible.  You see today I went in to town to meet my Aunt and my mum, I was dropped of at the bus stop and met them in town.  I then walked with them to look for a winter jacket and had to sit down twice before I passed out.  The house where I am staying (thanks to the most amazing friend in the world) has stairs and this morning I had to come down them on my bum as I could not walk down them and on Monday I have to get to the hospital by 10.30am, how I am going to achieve that I have no idea.  So yeah, while getting out of hospital was an amazing achievement, now it seems that I have to truly come to terms with what living with cancer means.